Priorities in relationships

This past sunday I talked about Song of Songs 2:8-3:5.  The key passage that I talked about was 2:15, “Catch for us the little foxes, the foxes that ruin our vineyard.”  Just to be clear, I did say foxes, not a different word that starts with “f”.

One of the foxes that I talked about was mixed up priorities in our relationships.  I said that for married people the center of our lives needs to be Christ, then our spouse, then our children.  A lot of marriages mix these things up and it leads to trouble.

I received a question this week from one of our Creekside folks, which was a great question and I wish I would have addressed it in the sermon.

“What are the priorities for single people?  It’s (1) Jesus (2) Spouse (3) children for married people but what about those without a spouse or children?”

Such a great question.  There are probably varying responses to this, but I would say that if you are a Christian then Jesus needs to remain central to your life.  Paul actually talks about this in 1 Corinthians 7:34

“. . .An unmarried woman or virgin is concerned about the Lord’s affairs: Her aim is to be devoted to the Lord in both body and spirit. But a married woman is concerned about the affairs of this world—how she can please her husband. 35I am saying this for your own good, not to restrict you, but that you may live in a right way in undivided devotion to the Lord.”

If you are currently single, then you have a great opportunity to follow after Jesus’ mission and his plan for your life.  This is a time when you can go on the adventure of a long-term mission trip, or you can give more time for a season to the ministry of the church.  Whatever you do while you are single pursue Jesus and his plan for you.

Do not put your friends in the central place of your life.  Do not put your career development in Jesus’ place.  Stay devoted to the Lord and to his work.  Everything else must be secondary.

When you get married then you will have to change your priorities again, while keeping Jesus central.  If Jesus remains central then you are doing the right thing whether married or single.

Thanks for the question.


“Count your blessings!”  You know why people use that expression?  Counting our blessings forces us to realize that we are better off than we think.  We tend to get bogged down in the struggle that is right in front of us and lose sight of all the things that are going right for us.

I started this blog listing all of the ways that I feel blessed.  Fewer things are more annoying than the people who brag about their blessings when you don’t feel personally blessed.  So if you are frustrated take account of the things that are going right for you.

Are you breathing?

Do you have the ability to laugh?

Do you have the ability to enjoy a good meal?

Do you have a favorite song?

Do you have a family (biological or otherwise) that loves you?

Do you have a job (even if you hate it)?

Count your blessings, I was reflecting on some of mine today and I feel very blessed.  Happy Thursday everyone!